far from perfect

Society has this deep desire for perfection. Or maybe it’s even becoming a requirement. It’s a sickness because no-one can live up to that. It’s such a shame that injecting poison into your face to deaden it and remove wrinkles is socially acceptable – and even encouraged. I could never do that to myself. I would never want anyone I know to do it to themselves. Nothing in life is perfect in every single way – but perfection to me comes with flaws. I think that ‘flaws’ are perfection, they are what makes us unique and interesting. I was taught that I am beautiful, I was brought up reading inspirational books of quotes and watching nature documentaries. I remember being in awe of my pop, he would take me and my brother down to the beach for a swim in summer and he was so at home in the water that I thought he was a dolphin. After the swim we would go back to grandmas house and meet mum with fish n chips for dinner. Those friday nights were the sweetest, and they will always remain close to my heart.

I have never been a follower. I wasnt popular at school, I was overweight and I got teased. I had no father at home to talk to, but my mother and grandparents were more than enough. I have always known how important they are in my life. When the other teenagers started smoking and drinking I resisted. I really had no desire to go there. I tried alcohol, I didnt like the taste. I didnt like the effect it had on people. My uncle was an alcoholic and so I saw how this drug can take a hold of your life. I didnt feel the need to do something I didnt want to just to fit in. And that has remained the same ever since. I have never been drunk and when I go out I avoid alcohol. I dont think it’s such a big deal. If my friends want to drink then I am ok with that, just as they should be ok with me not drinking. If they’re not then they arent really my friends. You should never feel pressured into doing anything you dont want to – by anyone!

We live in a world where the most important professions – such as teachers and nurses are some of the lowest paid and yet hockey stars and actors get paid far too much. It doesnt make much sense to me. Pay packets should relate to the jobs we do and how important they are in society. Surely teachers who are shaping our future generations of children and nurses who look after the sick should be up the top?!!

I have this innate need inside to change the world, it’s been hovering around there for a long time now. I dont know how I am going to do it – what form it will take or when it will happen – but it must. In some way, when the time is right, we must all do what we can to change the world for the better. We must eliminate greed, hatred, ignorance and injustice -education seems to be the answer. How does someone know what they are doing is wrong and how to change? Only by education. I was talking about this the other day with Ed about the drug addicts situation. Sure, we can make them sober and take the drugs away but unless they want to change and are educated about everything then it wont make a difference when they return to their normal lives. If the temptation is there then that’s often too much.

If you could see me now and read the words I’m writing I would want you to know that I am happy. I am happy because I have given myself permission to be happy. I am flawed, I am far from perfect but I like who I am. I’ve gone through a lot, I have changed a lot. But I can honestly say that I love myself and I am not ashamed to be alone. I am surrounding myself with people who I look up to, who encourage and motivate me. I no longer find myself drawn to negative people. I am learning.

What do you think? What are you learning?


7 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Trackback: Tweets that mention far from perfect « Al's Adventure -- Topsy.com
  2. Cristina
    May 11, 2010 @ 04:23:29

    I’m totally agree with this. I’ve proven the alcohol, and smoke and it’s something I’m not happy with. You are totally great not doing it. I realized that I’ve wasting my time, killing myself, getting my pocket empty, everything bad. Since more than a year I don’t do it and I’m so happy with myself, with the way I feel, with the way the things are now. Working out, going to live outside, not letting my problems eating me. I can drink a beer or something when I’m partying, but nothing to do with then. If your friends are true they know how to let the rest do whatever they want. My former friends didn’t, so I left. I did things I shouldn’t and I’m not happy with that, and they were part of these. Now I’m learning a lot. Each day I feel better. I don’t like to be a follower, just do the things I want to. And I’m so glad that the things I’m doing now are making me a better person.

    The job thing.. another thing we’re agree. Those entertainers gain a lot of money for doing “nothing” compare with others that are making the world.

    I hate the negativity. I love to be in calm, not all the day freaking out about nothing and giving bad energy to everyone. I feel that a lot when it’s around me. I always try to give good vibes and not the opposite, ’cause it’s what I want to recieve.


    p.s: I like the new template, btw.


    • Alesha
      May 11, 2010 @ 09:35:12

      It sounds like you have learnt a lot through experience about what works for you. Thats great! A lot about life we have to experience ourselves in order to learn and change and grow. Sometimes although people tell us something we have to have our own trials with it first.
      Good on you for being so positive, I like your attitude 🙂
      Thanks xx


  3. YJ
    May 11, 2010 @ 05:36:46

    Thanks for commenting! =) If you ever find yourself in the states, I’ll give you a slice! Haha

    Yeah, most people tend to be followers… myself included a lot of the time. I really should quit smoking, especially since I’ve seen what it can do to people. Ah well, some day…. one of those things you’ve just got to be mentally prepared to do, right? =)

    I agree, entertainers are way overpaid, but that’s mostly a result of supply and demand, isn’t it? They’re idols, almost modern day ‘gods’ and when our lives aren’t quite going the way we want it to, I think people like to get lost in how the rich and famous live. It’s a distraction, almost a fairy tale. Definitely not saying it’s right that they’re being glorified so much more than our hard-working public servants, but people in general don’t want to really know how hard other people work… Looking at celebrities gives people hope… “Maybe I can be like that someday…” while knowing realistically that it’ll never happen. But the hope maybe helps the average 9-5er get through the day. To maybe dream that the same old job isn’t going to be for the rest of their lives. In a perfect world, we would look at our teachers, police officers, nurses, etc., and think, “I should work as hard as that… these people do so much for society.” Haha okay I don’t think I’m making any sense anymore, but hopefully it’s somewhat coherent! =)

    And yeah, it’s totally important to surround yourself with positive people. I’ve found myself a lot happier after I got rid of all the bad seeds in my life =)


    • Alesha
      May 11, 2010 @ 09:44:25

      Haha I’ll seek out a slice for sure!
      Yes, its true. Most people do just go along on the path others have led them to. But imagine how much more interesting and satisfying it is to wander along on a path you have chosen for yourself!

      Wow, great insight ino the job thing. You really made a great point! I know I have often daydreamed about being an actor. I’m all for giving people hope but maybe what we hope for should change. I think our obsession with celebrity is getting a bit scary – we see these people on tv or on the big screen and we think that somehow that gives us access to them 24/7. And then we idolise them and make them out to be something that they arent. Times are strange!!

      Thanks so much for your thoughts!! 🙂


  4. jane
    May 11, 2010 @ 09:34:47

    This is a really great post which brings up so many important and interestign issues. I completely agree with you about the importance of not conforming and not just doing things for the sake of it or because people make you feel that you should do. Those people are not ones to choose to spend time with, but that lesson takes a while to learn.

    I too have been thinking a lot about social justice and the role that education and information plays in it. A lot of factors have made me really consider my worldview recently – med school, i guess, but also the elections we’ve just had in the UK where we had to make big decisions about what sort of government we wanted, and WHY. I’ve been realising how important it is to be outward-looking and non-selfish when thinking about these things, but I’ve also been realising that not everyone feels this way. So much of what you said rang true – education is absolutely key, so many people make so many different kinds of poorly informed decisions, and I know how lucky I am to be someone who had the chance to have a good education and to pursue all my goals and hopes.

    The being alone thing is a really important thing to me too. I’ve been feeling the same way – that it’s fine, and good – and i’m always surprised when I speak to a friend who really just feels unable to even be in a room alone for more than half an hour or so. It’s a process, though.

    Thank you for such a great and thought-provoking post!


    • Alesha
      May 11, 2010 @ 10:29:27

      And thankyou for such an indepth and interesting reply!!
      Some lessons take quite a while to learn. It’s funny, I remember often going through the same situations and thinking ‘i’ve been through this before, why does this keep happening?’ Obviously I hadnt learnt the lesson correctly and I had to keep going through it until I did!

      Elections are interesting things. Sometimes it is hard to see through all the promises to find out what the candidates are really like and what they will really do for your country. I regained a lot of hope for the world after Barack Obama was elected, I must admit. Here’s hoping the majority of people made the right decision in the UK votes!

      I think that only until you can be truly and completely comfortable by yourself and in your own skin you cant really give yourself to others. Because in a way you dont know/accept what you are giving – if that makes sense?!


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